“There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered.”
― Nelson Mandela
I wish I could say I was drawing and painting the whole time. But, honestly, for much of these past two years, I was just staying afloat. Sort of. I bought a new-to-me house, made some career choices and have been piecing my life back together from a failed relationship. These days, they call things like that “adulting”. It’s nice. And exhausting. But in a good way. I highly recommend it. It came late to me due to some obstacles in my life that I didn’t recognize as obstacles at the time. But, as the saying goes, better late than never.
Throughout, I had been confronted with the idea of letting go of this blog. Each time, I decided not to do that. I didn’t delete my other blog either. I had just started this blog when I went into deep stealth mode. But, I couldn’t have been sure when I’d get back to this. Although I still kept a journal (more like a few journals), I took it all offline. There’s a lot of beauty and ugliness in personal growth. While I think social media platforms are great for accountability’s sake, sometimes, your growth has to be personal. Sometimes, it all has to happen in private, behind closed doors. It’s just more true that way.
My journals have been both analog and digital. I’m a creature of habit. But I like my personal thoughts scattered. I’ve lost too many over the years when I’ve tried to just keep all my eggs in a single basket. I’m the type that likes to lol back sometimes. Irks my soul when I can’t. One, I have been keeping in a large bound book. I only use it at home. It’s way too big to tote around. Plus, it’s more my angry book. A lot of brooding in that one! Nobody needs to see it. In fact, the world as I know it might come to an end if it fell into the wrong hands.
Another, I keep in an app called Momento. Momento takes snippets from all my social media accounts as well as anything I manually write and throws it all together in a nice chronological stream within the app. I use tags to keep things in order. Loves it!
Lastly, when I wanted something compact that I could take with me, I went looking for a notebook that could fit in my bag and found an online community that loved one by Travelers Notebooks.
You likely already know this or have one of your own (they’re that popular)…There are lots of versions of the original brand (which used to be called Midori). It’s a Japanese-based company. Funny that I was drawn to it because I’ve always admired Japanese aesthetics. I ordered one for myself and found that the notebooks actually work very well for the things I like to do. I really like the versatility of being able to order ready-made inserts or diy inserts myself.
Pretty cool stuff. I draw, paint and practice my lettering in that one. I also keep it for journaling. Not so angry journaling though. Mostly stuff about my kids or the occasional doodle.
Sometimes, it’s about a bunch of nothing. Just jabbering on about whatever.
But why would you want to see photos of blurred writing?
I can fit a sketchbook insert in this that can take wet media. But I also have some extra pads for drawing and painting hanging around when I am feeling artsy.
I need more practice with watercolors. A million mistakes. Seems I’m still an oil painter at heart. I want to cover up everything. As long as the watercolor police aren’t around, I guess I’m okay. It is my journey after all. Close it up and on to the next…
My journaling time is usually at night when the kid is in bed. Not great for light or color when I want to draw or paint…and it can bother my eyes from time to time. But, for quiet, it can’t be beat.
I suppose it’s time to get back on the wagon now. I’m sure some things will still remain private since I don’t think I’m done growing. But, for accountability’s sake, it’s nice to have a place pick up where I left off.